balance

Quotes for days

You wanna know what lights me up? What gets to my heart strings and gets me right in my soul? Quotes. I am a quote junky. Pinterest doesn’t help my addiction. A good soulful quote, I am a blob on the floor. A hilariously accurate quote about parenting, laughing for days. It’s the little things in life right? If I could plaster quotes all over my house I would (wait I think I might have already started doing that). I believe that certain quotes have the ability to put situations into words when we can’t find them ourselves. Along with song lyrics, it’s amazing how someone else’s words can resonate with us so much. I’ve compiled a list of some sayings, quotes, whatever you want to call them, that have helped me at one time or another. Sometimes you just need that catch phrase to help you through something or keep you focused on your end goal. Enjoy and feel free to steal them if need be. . . I have no idea who said them in the first place.

1) STAY IN YOUR LANE- I put this one in caps simply because it is short and sweet and ohso true!!!! This is something I have to remind myself to do when I am interfering too much or a gentle (not always so gentle) reminder I may have to give to someone else. It’s simple and doesn’t really need a lot of explanation. Focus on you and just like when you’re driving on the road, stay in your lane. That’s all you have to worry about and all that should concern you. You aren’t a traffic cop of life. What everyone else is doing is none of your business and isn’t something you need to control or worry about. Eyes looking forward, that’s where you’re going afterall.

2) What other people think of you is none of your business- I used to have a really hard time with this one. What do you mean it’s none of my business? If someone has an opinion of me I have a right to know what their thoughts are about me. Nope. You don’t need to know any of it. They aren’t your thoughts, or your words, or your opinions, so they don’t concern you. Chances are you probably don’t want to hear it anyways if it hasn’t been said to your face in the first place. Do yourself a favour and let this one go.

3) Not everything that weighs you down, is yours to carry- Oh my goodness!!!! This one has definitely resonated with me especially during the past few months when I have taken more time to ground myself and work on finding more inner peace. This quote is for all you fixers out there who feel like you HAVE to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders and fix everyone else’s problems. Guess what? You don’t. Yes it is very hard to watch someone you love make the same mistakes over and over again, but at some point you have to step back and understand that at some point people have to put their big kid panties on and start owning their own shit. This is still something I struggle with especially when it comes to family, but at the end of the day not everything has to involve you. You can’t fix EVERYTHING for EVERYONE.

4) You are responsible for your own happiness- This is a major one. It’s not hard to understand but it seems to be something we all struggle with. You shouldn’t rely on anyone or anything to make you happy. It’s a choice. It’s action. It’s putting one foot in front of the other and self talking yourself through the hard times. You need to take responsibility and do it for you. Make happiness happen for you.

5) When someone shows you who they really are, believe them- Actions speak louder than words right? We really need to start believing people when they act a certain way over and over again. We all want to believe there is good in people and there probably is BUT in some people I think it’s wayyyyyy deep down. At the end of the day life is too short to be making the same mistakes over and over again and dragging yourself through the mud. You can’t be mad at someone for being a jerk to you if they have shown you that they are in fact that jerk about ten times before that. (Remember that other quote- You are responsible for your own happiness).  Let them go and wish them well. It doesn’t have to be a dramatic curtain closing or anything, just wish them well and go your own way.

I could go on and on and on forever. These are just a few that I think are basic and everyone can relate to. If anything they can act as simple reminders or cues to you to keep the good energy flowing and in the end do what’s best for you. If you are a quote junkie such as myself, may I recommend DEFINITELY having a wisdom or positivity board on Pinterest. Somewhere you can view all of the cheesiness and gooeyness on the days that are difficult.

Create your own sunshine when needed 🙂

Mama Hil.xo

Give Yourself A Break

Well summer is officially here. The kids are PUMPED and the questions of “What are we doing today?!” or “Where are we going?!” are upon us. Every summer I worry that I’m not going to have enough for my kiddies to do or they are going to look back and think “That was the worst summer ever.” While I do have day trips planned I’ve decided to “TRY” and be chill this summer. Take the pressure off of myself and get rid of the guilt that can sometimes consume me. In true Mama Hil fashion here is a list of ways I plan to take it easy on myself (feel free to be inspired and do the same for yourself).

1- Let my kids play. . .by themselves! Crazy concept I know. Use your imagination kids! I remember when I was a kid, after a school year of been hovered over by teachers, I wanted my parents to give me some space. I get sucked into feeling guilty as a parent and feel like I should ALWAYS be right with my kids doing what they’re doing. I have come to realize though that when I get involved too much, I either annoy my kids or that’s when the fights break out (go figure). So this summer parents, when your kids are hanging outside, pull up a lawn chair, maybe read that book that’s collecting dust, and let their creativity take over for them.

2- Yes my kids will have screen time this summer. . .#sorrynotsorry Some parents are very strict about screen time with their kids. That is totally cool with me #youdoyou. We all have certain things we’re more strict with. There is no right way to parent and every kid is different. But in the morning when I am trying to make myself presentable (you’re welcome) or if I’m looking for just a half hour of quiet time, the tv will most likely be going on. Just like adults need their chill time, kids like that too. So if you need just a few moments of sanity, than feel free to flip on that telly.

3- It’s okay to not go on a million road trips- A lot of the time kids think because they are on summer vacation, the rest of the world is too. Sorry kids. There are summer camps for a reason. Parents work and still have to adult throughout the week. As a parent, guilt once again may trick you into believing that you have to drive for a few hours in every direction to really mean that you took your kids somewhere. Most times I find that taking your kid to your towns splash pad or park is more exciting for them than anything you took months planning. Think like a kid this summer. Keep it simple and realize that if you’re working all summer and don’t have the ability to take your kids all over, chances are they are totally okay with it.

4- Smores, watermelon, and ice cream on the menu- Come summertime, parents no longer have to pack lunches (bonus) and the heat implies yummy treats and smore filled fire nights. Somedays your kids aren’t going to eat all their fruits and vegetables, and it may seem like their diet consists of more sugar than usual. Having a bit more sugar, and relaxed menu throughout the summer won’t destroy your kids for life. I remember living off popsicles on really hot days, and hot dogs because we clearly had sophisticated pallets. Maybe take it down a notch and remember what it was like to be a kid. Most of us turned out just fine. Spending more time outside is more beneficial than planning a five course meal every night.

5- Yes splash pads and pools do count as baths- Sandboxes, chlorine, beach days, sweating everywhere days, and that campfire smell. All of these things are the smells and grosseness (totally not a word but oh well) of summer. Chances are after long days and late nights, your kids aren’t going to be bathed as regularly. Parents are tired and we all know how kids feel about bathing. Kids don’t smell as much as adults do (sorry parents you need to keep showering for obvious reasons) so not bathing them EVERY SINGLE DAY doesn’t make you a bad parent. Loosen the reins and realize that if someone has an issue with your dirty kids, chances are they either don’t have children of their own, have serious control issues, or aren’t really your kind of people anyways.

I could go on and on about becoming more chill this summer and I get that for most of us it’s hard. One thing I’m pretty strict on is keeping a semi decent bedtime because come September it’ll be a tricky transition back into the school routine if I don’t. See, we all have our thing. Maybe you are thinking “I cancel my cable for the summer for no screen time” or “My kids will have no extra sugar over the summer” and that is completely cool with me. As parents we all feel guilty about different things, and we all definitely have very different kids. Some need structure, and some love to be wild and free over the summer. My Motto for this summer is “If it doesn’t go with the flow, than let it go.” Stay on your path, do what you wanna do for the summer, and lay off on the comparison and guilt trips for a few months. Your sanity will thank you.

Mama Hil.xo

 

3 Emotions We’ve ALL Felt

As we get older and experience more in life our emotions get deeper and more complex. Events happen, life changes us, and our emotions are no different. Over time we accumulate what some may call “emotional baggage” Some of us have more than others depending on our different experiences and how we reacted (or didn’t react to them).

Some of us wear our emotions on the outside as well as feeling them on the inside. Whereas some people choose to hide them. They know that they’re there, but they have no intentions of letting anyone else see that. No matter what side of the coin you are on, one thing remains the same: WE ALL FEEL EMOTIONS.

There is a lot going on in day to day life. We clearly no longer live in a world of rotary phones and simpler times. There’s a lot of vocabulary, information, and opinions thrown at us every day. In an attempt to simplify things and show similarity I’ve narrowed it down to three emotions that I think we have all felt and could even be feeling at this very moment. You may not have felt all of these things but I am 99.9% sure that you have at least felt one of these emotions at some point in your life.

LONELINESS-  I know that seems so weird because we have so many resources available to us to connect with people. Any day, anywhere, anytime. What we are lacking is the face to face connection. The one on one and deep conversations. You can text a friend for hours, but it ends up getting more irritating waiting for a response and we’ve all been guilty of reading into the tone of a text more than we should. In a time when we are constantly connected we find ourselves feeling more lonely than ever before. If anything it should teach us that we did survive before social networking and when it comes to our relationships with people, it’s okay to go back to basics. In fact, it’s much better for our health.

EXHAUSTION- I’m not just talking about being tired. I’m talking about ache in your bones, brain fog, not enough hours or coffee in the day to keep you going. How awful is it that we run ourselves ragged just to try and keep up or not miss out on something (some of us have a mad case of FOMO). Your brain is tired, you feel like you could cry at the drop of the hat, and it’s a struggle to move your body. Let me say something about this. THIS IS NOT OKAY AND IT CERTAINLY IS NOT HEALTHY. We all say we wish we could slow down but we don’t. Soooo we go on to run ourselves into the ground and then wonder why we feel exhausted? I do it too, but I can also admit that sometimes my exhaustion is self inflicted.

STRESS/ANXIETY- I may get some backlash for saying this, but I do feel as though the word anxiety is thrown around A LOT. That having been said, seeing how busy, and chaotic that life has become, it is no wonder that words such as anxiety have become more common. Stress is something I feel quite often. If I’m not stressing about getting my kids to activities or appointments, than it’s internal stress I put on myself like am I doing enough, am I enough? It’s crummy to think that this is the new normal and we’ve come to a point in time where if you aren’t questioning yourself or stressed out, than you must be doing something wrong. We’re always trying to keep up with something or someone, and stress is just the accomplice that goes along with that.

So yes we definitely have a lot thrown at us on the daily, BUT we have the ability to control how it affects us. Like any great skill, this takes practice, awareness, and wanting to make a change. We need to stop complaining about feeling these emotions which aren’t healthy or beneficial, and make a change. I definitely know I need too not only for my health but also for my sanity. Complaining is the new action. It’s easier to complain than to make a change. What we seem to forget is that what’s happening on social media isn’t as important as what is passing us by in the real world.

So together let’s make a change. Step back and focus on what’s really important. If you’re looking for a sign than here it is. I give you permission (not that you need it by any means), to simplify your life, and actually take your life back.

Mama Hil. xoxoxo

 

 

Things I should care about. . .but don’t

There are a lot of opinions out there on just about every topic you can imagine. Parenting is no exception to this. Social media definitely inflates this and can sometimes drive a parent to the brink of insanity by making us think that we need to care about anything and everything. I’m here to say that there are quite a few things when it comes to parenting my children that I just don’t care about. Sorry, they just aren’t on my radar. I am sharing them in an effort to perhaps help another parent who maybe feels the same way but doesn’t want to feel like a) a bad parent or b) like they are the only crazy one out there. Never fear I’m right here with you. So here it goes- the list of things I don’t care about but sometimes feel like I should.

Cleaning my kids toys- Nope sorry. I hate cleaning as it is and once my kids go to bed sitting down and wiping every single toy they touched is not high on my priority list. The dog just had it in there mouth? Cool. Dropped it in dirt? I’ll just wipe it on my already dirty shirt and we’ll be good to go. Germs are everywhere and I’m just not that mom that is going to try and fight every single one.

Packaged snacks in my kids lunches- My kids always get fruit and veggies in their lunches. I always say they eat better during the week when I have to make their lunches than they do on the weekends (cereal for lunch? sure thing!) BUT I don’t skimp on the slightly sugary snacks either. So yes my kids will get teddy grahams and fruit gummies in their lunches along with the good stuff. It’s the little things in life that really put a smile on their faces, so the sugar will remain in the lunchbox.

Occupying my kids ALL THE TIME- I love my kids obviously, but at some point all children need to learn how to occupy themselves and use their IMAGINATION. Nowadays it seems as though there is this pressure be on our kids all the time. CONSTANTLY engaging with them, activities for them to do, places to go and educate them. I am a firm believer that like adults, sometimes kids just need to be left alone. Don’t poke the bear. I am all for doing fun things with your kids but at the same time independent play is a beautiful thing not only for them but for you too.

Where my kids go to school- I could be totally wrong here, but I always believed that there are rough crowds everywhere. Every school has them. Elementary school, high school, colleges and universities, catholic, private, whatever may be out there. Real life entails some pretty rough and not so great people too. What school you go to doesn’t indicate what type of person you are going to be. All you can do is trust that your kids will choose to surround themselves with people that care about them.

At the end  of the day “to each their own” You do you and I’ll do me. If there is anything that becoming a parent has taught me it’s that you need to pick your battles, toughen up your skin, and don’t lose sight of what is really important.

Stay in your lane and do what works best for your fam jam. It’s okay to agree to disagree. Every parent is different, every child is different, and every family is different. We’re all just flying by the seat of our pants most of the time anyways. So let’s raise a glass (it’s 5 o’clock somewhere) and show some solidarity with fellow parents. At the end of the day we all end up feeling like snack bitches, chauffeurs, maids, and personal chefs on the daily.

If there is anything I want you to take away from this it’s a good laugh and the feeling of knowing that you aren’t alone. You’re never alone

Mama Hil.xo

 

Back to Basics

I have identified as a lot of different things in life. I think as people we go through different seasons and our identity shifts. Sometimes it’s good and seamless, and sometimes it’s difficult and confusing. Certain seasons we aren’t really sure which way we’re going or how things are going to turn out. We want to label our purpose in life and compartmentalize it so we feel better. Such as “Okay this is my job and this is what I get up and do everyday. So if people ask I have an appropriate answer and I feel like I am contributing to society.”

But what if you don’t have an exact answer? Does the unknown make you any less of a person? I believe that is my stage right now. Hold on because there is a big dose of raw honesty coming your way so bare with me.

Let me give you a snapshot of my life. I have an amazing husband. He is straight up my best friend and he loves and appreciates me in all of my quirkiness. We have three amazing kids who challenge me on the daily, but bring so much joy and love to my life at the same time. We live on a dairy farm where I am happily surrounded by animals from cows to dogs on a daily basis. Believe me when I say that I am so incredibly grateful, lucky and blessed.

Prior to our youngest son being born, I felt as though I was very much contributing to our life on the farm. I was stay at home mama and calf feeder and I felt as though I had the best of both worlds.

As per usual though, life happens. After our youngest was born my “title” you could say as well as my identity shifted. I found myself more of a stay at home mom and less of a contributing factor to the farm itself.

Never in my life have I been a stay at home mom. There has always been something else along with it. Waitress, accounting assistant, calf feeder. It took me quite a few months, post partum depression, and probably too many glasses of wine to realize that this transition had been harder on me than I originally thought. . .

I love being home with my kids. 100% I had always hoped that I would get to do something that allowed me to be with them majority of the time. Everyone is different, but for me it was always something I had wished and hoped for. So obviously A LOT of guilt came with me wanting something else to go along with it. What’s the saying? “Remember when you prayed for the things you have now.” So there was mom guilt right in my face. Loud, ugly, and not easily ignored.

Lately I’ve been trying to fill the void with fitness/ accountability coaching and it hasn’t been the most positive experience for me. Sometimes you win and sometimes you learn right? I enjoy working out, pushing myself, and taking care of my health and well being. But as I’ve come to realize, it has been hard for me to motivate others without feeling like I’m in their face or being all salesman like. I love posting my videos and pictures of my progress, but I realized that I enjoy doing that more to keep myself accountable.

It’s safe to say that I fell into the trap of trying to be like those I see and follow on social media. What they were doing worked for them so it would probably work for me too right?! Duh Hil, major no. What sets their soul on fire might not to do the same for me. I just finished reading my second book by one of my favourites Gretchen Rubin. One of the splendid truths in her books is to simply “Be Gretchen.” Stay true to herself and do what makes her happy and fills her cup no matter what others may think or feel.

Needless to say this struck a chord with me. You know one of those light bulb moments where you read the line over and over again because it makes so much sense to you. I realized that I needed to do something along the same lines. “Be  Hilary”I need to step back and get back to the basics of well. . .me. What I love, what is important to me, and what contributes to my happiness in this life.

Today in social media I see a lot of kick ass women out there doing there thing and rocking the world. They are go big or go home type ladies, and they are ready to take on the world. That is so incredibly amazing. . .but it’s also not for everyone out there. It’s okay to not want to be a big CEO, boss babe who travels all over the place and has a hundred thousand followers on Instagram. Yes it does work for some, but if the idea of that doesn’t excite you than regardless of what is on social media or what society tells you. . .You have to be okay with that. You have to be okay with forging your own path and doing your own thing. It’s going to be difficult and you”ll probably feel uncomfortable. I know it’s easier said than done and trust me I’m working on it too.

When it’s all said and done we are constantly changing and evolving. Sometimes you know exactly who you are and what you’re doing and other times life makes it a little trickier. You have to dig deep, get uncomfortable, and take a good hard look at yourself.

Right now I’m trying (key word being try), to dial back the pressure I put on myself as well as the pressure I may feel from outside sources. I’m trying to focus on what is most important to me and channel all my energy into that.

Who you are and what you do can and will change throughout your life. Of that I am 100% certain. How you embrace it is a choice that only you can make.

Me? I’m bring it back to the basics.:)

Mama Hil.xo

 

Be here. . .Seriously

The other day I was walking up the back path on our farm with my 6 month old daughter. Just enjoying the warm weather (I LOVE the heat), and I was looking around and thinking about how far I have come not only as a person, but as a mother, wife, friend, every title I have in my life. 6 years ago I couldn’t just walk and be alone with my own thoughts. I would have my headphones in, music as loud as it could go without blowing my ear drums, and walk like I was trying to escape from something. At the time I didn’t know it, but I think subconsciously I was trying to escape from the life I was living. I became a mother for the first time at 19. I don’t expect sympathy because it was my choice and my decision to go down that path in life. Unfortunately for me I didn’t appreciate motherhood for all that it was and all that it could make me. I didn’t appreciate the little moments like walking in nature with my little one, treasuring every smile, and stroking his hair while he slept soundly. So I guess this specific post is about being in the now.

  1. Kids don’t stay kids forever- Right now I have the pleasure of experiencing both ends of the spectrum. I have a 7 year old who has grown and has developed his own personality and way of doing things. He is his own person and makes his own decisions everyday some good and some not so good. Then I have the 6 month old who is fully dependent on me, thinks I’m the funniest person alive, and who can’t stop me when I pinch her cheeks and kiss her face way too much. What I’ve noticed more now than ever is that it truly goes in the blink of an eye. Before you know it this person you have shaped is off doing there own thing, doing their own activities and creating a life away from you. Which I make sound horrible but it’s definitely a positive thing. But this just means that you have to truly appreciate every special little moment with your child. Every age has different moments, and the special moments may change from snuggling, the reading a story together. Whatever it may be, you have to be there for it. Let it consume you and treat it as though this is the most important moment in your life.
  2. Like it or not marriage and relationships change and evolve- I still remember my first date with my husband. The smell of the leather seats in his car, his bright eyes, his dimples, and those working man hands. Now all of those external features are still there, but I may not always notice them in the same way anymore. We get comfortable in our relationships , as you really should being with someone you love and who loves you just as you are. Day to day duties, jobs, kids, stresses seem to engulf you as a couple and before you know it your relationship has changed before your eyes. I believe I have a great marriage, but I also know that I don’t always treasure our special time together. Really soak it all up. Laying in bed talking, watching a show together, just driving around together. Basically having him there. Many people lose spouses whether it’s because of illness, sudden accident, or divorce. So if you are in a good relationship with someone you love, I challenge you to really be grateful for them and appreciate even 5 minutes of alone time you may have. Maybe next time don’t say you’re too tired for sex, or put your phone down and focus on them. This is the person you’ve chosen to spend your life with, and not everyday is roses and rainbows, but treat them with the up most love and respect that you felt the first time you ever met them.
  3. What you have, no matter how small, is worth A LOT- In our home we have mismatched couches, doors in every corner since it’s an old farm house, mismatched dishes, crumbs on our floors, and cobwebs in certain corners. Our home isn’t perfect and neither are the people that live under it’s roof. But the people and relationships are worth more than anything in this house. Some people have the pleasure of having a lot, and others are just scraping by. This is just the way life is, and probably ho it’s always going to be. I believe with age comes wisdom and with that wisdom comes the realization that memories and life and love are built with people and not things. Relationships are what help us all survive this crazy life, and what keep us  going. If I continue to have the people in my life that I have now, and I never make much more than I do now, I could survive. Money does funny things to people and just buys temporary things. Relationships are permanent and can last a lifetime.

So I guess if you take anything away from this just try to appreciate and practice gratefulness for what you do have and the little moments that you are given. They don’t last a lifetime and little moments make up your life. Teach your children and grandchildren and keep the message going on.

Relationships and Motherhood

We all know that as life changes so do relationships. Some we have our whole lives, some come and go like the seasons. They all generally teach us something whether it’s good bad or ugly. Something I have noticed is that relationships once you are a mother change. Sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worst. I like to think looking back now that big changes like motherhood really show you people true colours. It can be a relationship with a spouse, with close friends, and even family. I’m going to list a few where I noticed the biggest changes and how that can affect you as a person, mother, and human being.

Spousal Relationship- I have two very different experiences. I had my son when I was 19 years old. He is almost 7 now and he is a lot of the reason why I am the way that I am (in the best possible way of course). Unfortunately for his father and for my son, his dad pretty much checked out the day he was born. I don’t want to get too personal but some men and women too just aren’t cut out to be parents. No matter what the circumstance and age, genetically some of us just don’t have that gene in us. A lot of the time it isn’t realized until after the child is born and then that makes things more complicated for everyone. I am married now and together we have a baby girl who is now 5 months old. My husband was ready to be a father and it definitely brings out the best in him. We were a good team before but now we are an even better one. Raising a human being is a lot of work and it truly shows us our strengths, weaknesses, and how much we can actually do with no sleep whatsoever. It’s one of the biggest tests of a relationship because a lot changes for both parties.Your spouse is the only other person who knows EXACTLY what you are going through because they deal with it too.  This time around has been a lot better for me but unfortunately you can never really know until you’re in that position.

Friend Relationships- I’ve heard it all before. From the if you ever need me to watch the baby for a few hours while you nap I will, or I’ll pop over all the time to keep you company. Trouble is, reality hits and people are busy. Plain and simple we all have a lot going on in our lives. Friends who don’t have children find it very hard to relate to you when you have a child. It’s not their fault or yours, it’s just that now your life is consumed with this baby that you grew in your body for 9 months and now get to cuddle and gah gah over as much as you would like. Friendships that you have had all throughout your life are some of the hardest to keep going. You go through so many changes and when  person isn’t at the point you are in your life it can make it hard for both of you to relate as much as you used to. You go from having the chance to see these people as much as you want, to having to plan coffee dates and girls nights out 3 months in advance so you can prepare leaving your child for a few hours, actually getting yourself excited to go somewhere because you are dog tired, and trying your best to feel somewhat normal again for an evening. The good news is that when you do get to see your closest friends, even if it’s once in a blue moon, it’s as though time hasn’t passed at all. They still recognize you as you and understand your need for adult conversation and getting caught up on all the gossip you have missed in your baby bubble. It’s always quality over quantity. Treasure those 3 hour coffee chats, and 6 months in advance trips to the spa. That is going to be what you remember when you look back and reflect on your friendships.

Family Relationships- The teenage years seem to be when we really try to ignore our parents, get embarrassed by them, and think that they know nothing about life. Cause you know everything right? Becoming a parent yourself makes you realize that when you were younger, you knew ABSOLUTELY NOTHING and your parents knew EVERYTHING.Damn it. For the most part, these relationships become the strongest and more important in your life. After all, they are what shape you as a person, and your children are going to learn from the relationship that you not only have with them, but your own parents and family members too. It’s easy to say that Family is really important, but when you are building one of your very own it really becomes a reality. In most families, of course there are always the exceptions, they are the group of people that truly want the best for you. They’ve seen you through EVERY SINGLE STAGE of your life. From pooping in your diaper, to your first really bad break up, to having your first child. Now they will be there all over again for birthday parties, graduations, weddings, you name it. Family will always be there.

Relationships are always what you are going to be remembered for. Doesn’t matter if you have 5 friends or 50 friends. Either way you are going to be remembered by the people who knew you the best. People come and go from your life, that’s just the way it goes. At the time it seems more tragic than it really is because you don’t always see the bigger picture. The bigger picture is that, it’s the people that stuck around, were there when you needed them, backed off when you needed that too, and who have seen you hit rock bottom and climb the highest mountain. Motherhood makes you appreciate relationships because you want the very best for your children and want them to have people like that in their lives too. It makes you realize not only what is important but who is important. Motherhood gives you the reality check you have probably always needed, and the clarity when it comes to who people truly are. Thank goodness for motherhood. It’s a swift kick in the ass in the best possible way 🙂